What a Meditation Retreat is Really Like
Do you ever dream of taking a deep breath and stepping away from the daily busyness? As a therapist, I see how individuals from all walks of life seek ways to manage overwhelming thoughts and emotional challenges.
Meditation retreats have become increasingly popular, offering a unique space for exploration and personal growth. Recently, I had the opportunity to attend a 3-day retreat myself, hoping to deepen my meditation practice and apply mindfulness practices within the therapeutic space with my clients. The teachings at Kadampa Meditation Retreat were rooted in Modern Kadampa Buddhism, offering a practical presentation of Buddha's teachings that is suited to everybody. The teachings are applicable to daily life and fit into every different type of society we may be from.
It was a beautiful escape from the daily grind and I left feeling deeply grounded and present. The retreat's schedule revolved around hour-long meditation sessions, a blend of guided meditations and insightful teachings. Beyond meditation, free time and mindful engagement with the surroundings fostered a deeper connection with nature and a sense of present-moment awareness.
The Kadampa Meditation Centre itself was a sanctuary, surrounded by lush greenery and breathtaking views. The retreat wasn't without its challenges, though. Balancing wanting to connect with others and relishing the solitude took conscious effort. My mind, accustomed to the constant hum of daily life, craved stimulation. During meditation sessions, I struggled to stay awake at times, slowly nodding off, and then jolting myself awake. Sometimes I felt desperate to run away. Yet, with each focused breath, I gently brought my awareness back to the present moment, strengthening my mental discipline.
“My mind, accustomed to the constant hum of daily life, craved stimulation.”
I arrived at the retreat nestled in the stunning Dandenong Ranges just before 6:00pm. If you’ve been to the Dandenong Ranges, then you know how beautiful the drive there is. The tall towering trees and lush green sassafras has a way of drawing your attention to the present moment. Once I checked in, I set up my tent amidst nature’s beauty. There was also the option to stay in a pre-erected tents, shared and private dorms.
Night 1
The evening unfolded with a simple, nourishing dinner – vegan soup and bread, served by the volunteers who worked at the retreat. Opting for solitude, I perched on the balcony, gazing over the Dandenong Ranges.
At 7:30 pm, the meditation room welcomed around 30 attendees, adorned with high ceilings and watchful Buddha statues. The meditation teacher initiated the session with a brief meditation, lasting 10 to 15 minutes, though the mental tumult made it feel far longer. A web of thoughts raced through my mind, and physical discomfort amplified the struggle. I felt a sense of impatience, frustration, and a longing for mental stillness.
The relief post-meditation was palpable, and teacher began setting the tone for the retreat by offering insights into the pursuit of happiness. This reflection on internal happiness resonated deeply with my therapeutic work. Clients often seek external solutions for internal struggles, yet the retreat underscored the importance of cultivating inner peace. This journey inward is universal, applicable to those experiencing personal issues, navigating trauma, or just wanting to connect with themselves.
The teachings on the pursuit of happiness, as shared during the retreat, don't discourage the joy and anticipation we feel about holidays or similar external events. After all, we've earned that happiness through our hard work. However, the deeper lesson lies in recognising that solely relying on external factors for happiness can leave us vulnerable. Consider if, for some reason, the anticipated holiday had to be cancelled – we’d be feeling pretty disappointed.
But what if we could cultivate internal happiness? This shift inward might empower us to navigate external circumstances that threaten our happiness with greater resilience and ease.
Day 2
The second day brought a chilly night in my tent, a stark contrast to family camping. Waking up, I felt a rare serenity, unburdened by the usual demands of work and parenting. The absence of responsibilities allowed me to appreciate the tranquility I often missed.
The day's schedule included four hour-long meditation sessions at 9am, 11am, 2:30 pm, and 4:30 pm. Since breakfast was only provided for those in dorms or pre-erected tents, I packed bananas and cereal.
Entering the meditation practice on the second day felt notably smoother. A restful night allowed me to be more grounded in the present. The meditation room, marked by serene quietness, heightened my senses to subtle sounds – people shifting in chairs, a distant itch being scratched, the gentle chirping of birds outside. In moments of complete mental stillness, I embraced the quietude, observing my breath, sensing tension in my body.
Post-meditation, the teacher offered lessons on inappropriate attention. Consider a recent scenario where I felt frustrated due to someone driving slowly in front of me. Rushing for work, I vented my displeasure in the car, harbouring negative thoughts about the driver's inconsiderate behaviour. My focus was solely on the external factor – the slow driver – which, according to Kadampa Buddhist teachings, is a misdirection of attention. Mindfulness encourages an inward shift, prompting reflection on personal reactions instead of attributing emotions to external elements. In this case, redirecting my attention would have revealed an underlying fear of being late for work.
Even without direct interactions, we convince ourselves of someone's negative qualities. Dwelling on these preconceptions fuels afflictions and solidifies our biases. The challenge lies in recognising this pattern and contemplating the validity of our thoughts.
“Mindfulness encourages an inward shift, prompting reflection on personal reactions instead of attributing emotions to external elements”
The second meditation session posed more challenges as my mind buzzed with reflections on conversations with fellow attendees and drifted into various corners of my psyche. Visualising my thoughts as balloons floating above, I detached myself repeatedly, cutting the strings and watching them drift away. Using my breath as an anchor to the present moment, I navigated the discomfort of observing thoughts without attachment. Despite moments of impatience, I committed to sitting through the practice, embodying the essence of meditation as a self-discipline exercise.
The post-lunch sessions reflected the ebb and flow of my mind. A long walk up prompted contemplation on the discomfort of prolonged stillness. A similar discomfort people feel around sitting with difficult feelings - something I witness in therapy with my clients. Naturally, we want to run away from things that make us feel uncomfortable, but allowing ourselves to experience the full brunt of our feelings is where the healing happens. I love this about being a therapist, witnessing clients allow themselves to feel their feelings.
Evenings brought community-building activities, like a lively game of Uno with international volunteers. The night ended with the practicality of hot water bottles and extra blankets for warmth, a thoughtful touch considering the chilly nights in a tent.
“Visualising my thoughts as balloons floating above, I detached myself repeatedly, cutting the strings and watching them drift away. ”
Day 3
There were two hour-long sessions before the prayer offering at the conclusion of the retreat. I opted to go for a walk and enjoy the scenery alone instead of attending the prayer offering. These moments alone were so sacred for me, so I wanted to make the most of it.
During lunch, conversations with some of the attendees unveiled varying reactions to the retreat experience. Some found solace, shedding tears and addressing inner conflicts during meditation, while others opted out, finding limits to prolonged self-reflection. For some, there was such a thing as “too much meditation”.
After lunch, I packed up my tent and belongings, found a wooden chair to sit on, and took in the panoramic views of lush greenery one last time, journaling some reflections I had about my experience.
Returning home, I felt protective of the inner peace I cultivated at the retreat, catching negative thoughts before spiralling. I got good at asking myself “what’s going on for me right now?”, turning my attention inward so as to not misdirect frustration and blame. This clarity motivated prioritising morning meditation before my daughter woke up, and boosted confidence in my therapeutic ability to guide clients in sitting with discomfort and redirecting attention to the present moment.
The investment in a meditation retreat was undeniably worthwhile. In a world filled with constant distractions, finding moments to be mindful is more important than ever.
Meditation Offerings in March & April
1. Kadampa Meditation Centre
Title: Don't Overthink It: Managing Stress & Anxiety | Sat 16 Mar
Date & Time: Saturday, March 16, 2024
Registration: 10 - 10.25 am
Teaching & Meditation: 10.30 - 11.30 am
Teaching & Meditation: 12 - 1 pm
Teaching & Meditation: 2.15 - 3.15 pm
Location: KMC Melbourne | Melbourne CBD
2. Aruna Giri
Title: One Heart Silent Retreat
Date: March 8-11, 2024 | 4 days, 3 nights
Location: Maitripa, Healesville, VIC.
Inclusions: Extensive practices, all meals, fruit & beverages, your room, post-retreat handouts, and practices.
3. Melbourne Buddhist Centre
Title: DOORWAYS TO THE BEYOND (Easter Retreat)
Date: March 28 - April 1 | 4 nights, 5 days
Location: Rowallan Girl Guide Camp/ Riddells Creek, Victoria
Duration: 5 days, 4 nights
4. Kadampa Meditation Centre
Title: Eight Steps to Happiness - Silent Retreat
Date: March 8 - March 11 | 3 nights, 4 days
Location: KMC Australia, Monbulk, VIC
Duration: 4 days, 3 nights Registration
Inclusions: Lunch and dinner included; breakfast for accommodation bookings. Vegan meals with some non-vegan options. Allergen-free meals not guaranteed.